A crappily structured love poem – Happy Anniversary my love [POEM]

My mind only sees your colours.
Only your smells passing through
The echoing corridors until
They merge together into your touch,
Your sounds, your taste.

Muted purples and browns swirl
Like cinnamon and sandalwood
Smoke, while stars blink out
In a crystal, iced blue that seems
Far too warm to be mortal.

Rich coffee laced with thick
Chocolate, canvas to be painted
On, raw silk and comfort.
You are my room of safety and
Joy, of silent happiness.

Everything I could need, in the
Richest fabrics. You are not
A flash, you are not gold, but
You do not need to be. You are
Pure quality, not shine.

You are my fireplace on cold,
Rainy days, in a messy room full
Of cushions and memories.
I will live in you forever. I was
Yours since I fell into your eyes.

[POEM] Loneliness

Silent drives with you under dark silk skies
Mean more to me than all of their lies.
Peace might not shine as hard as love after
Quarrel, but I melt into joy at your laughter.
I wouldn’t trade our silent moments together
For the loud loneliness of past lived forever.
For the taste of bitter excitement and longing
Instead of the soft buttery warmth thronging
In my heart for you. For always. For better, and always best.

[POEM] Ramblings inspired by Anthony Anaxagorou

Inspired by Anthony Anaxagorou

Can we spell love with the taste of another’s skin
Against our fingers. Brushing over a carapace to inspect
Each lingering line and hardness that has been shaped
Across lifelines. Lovers cross palms with tarnished silver,
Hoping to find fortunes hidden in a stranger’s gaze,
In someone else’s hopes and dreams,
By being someone else’s hopes and dreams,
Reflected back into themselves. The end of each path
Breeds nothing but disenchantment. Disappointment.
If you walk a new path harder, perhaps you will find
The treasure, behind the wrapping paper of someone’s flesh.
What care is given to the discarded shell, of hopes that are not out own,
Once the cold shiny gem of promise is revealed.
A promise of another day basking in the torn love of another,
A promise of another day balming over the pain of purpose.
But as your fingers touched my skin, I felt no searching.
Your nails did not dig or pluck into cracks, but smoothed them
Over without hiding the truth of their incessant pain.
Bring near your soft words, hushing over the screams of
The world, demanding, while the soft breath from your lips
Gently offers peace and simplicity. I wear my cracks
Like chains of gold across my pallid form, you drip them with
Tear drops of melted diamonds, hold my hands in yours as if
You might lose me should you let go. I find my resonance within,
Our souls shaking to the same rhythm, fervent atoms
Creating a new wave of chemistry to drown out the stars.
My body may not offer a deep soil where you can take root,
But you demand nothing from me. Not to take seed within
My softest parts, or grow your hopes out of the brokenĀ  lines
Of my loss. Instead, you compare your own hard cracks
To mine, slowly. Over time I know you like an atlas.
This map holds the beauty of home, and I know
I shall walk its lands until the day that I lay down and die.
Lost in your lands. Tending them. Caring for them.
Hoping to one day be buried here, so that I may never leave
This place of unexpected wonders, even in death.
I will haunt you with love, my sweetest one. I hope you
Will keep the demons of my past within you, and they will
Guard your happiness with their unholy lives.

 

[POEM] Cross yourself

Cross yourself with due diligence,
Marking off each of your sins
One by one until they ring in your
Head, drowning out every sound.

What, then, do you hear?

Flimsy plastic sword of intelligence
Battles the stifling outs and ins
Of your demons, bitter and sour,
Stuck firm and tightly wound.

Who, then, is near?

Broken ribs creak inwards to
Crush the fluttering heart
That dies to break free so very
Desperately. Pain. Just pain.

Alone, even darkness shuns you
And leaves you far apart
From the world of mortals, nary
A breath or soul looks in vain.

Let me pass.

[POETRY] Womanhood

Drip conceit upon me like wax,
Hardening against my skin in armored
Pretending. With each wrong word
A hammer cracks against it.
My skin turns sallow with
The baptism of opinions from mouths
That don’t even know the taste
Of womanhood.

I cross myself with fertile words.
Sacrifices to chastity, grace and honesty,
My three sisters who harangue me
Into a box in which I do not fit.
I will wash away this chalky
Second skin of regret and lost moments,
Seeing scorn on their expectant faces,
Bathing in their disappointment.

My failure to womanhood binds
Me as the sacrificial lamb. They will use
The cracks in my skin to plant seeds of
Lies made of should be and could be.
Watch the weeds grow and choke
My still form, unwilling and unconsenting
In a slumber so deep I would
Never wish to wake again.

[POEM] It is back

It has reared its ugly head again.
I would say it was sadness, but it is pain.
I would say it is a dip, but it’s a trough.
It feels as if I will never be enough.
It has crawled its way into my heart,
Hoping to tear my progress apart.
As long as it has taken me to move on,
It suddenly feels as if it’s never been gone.
My self control is waning every second.
I can’t help but fall into this fecond
Pit of material comfort. I would rather
Crawl out than stand, buried, than gather
Dust down here.

Down here alone, and failing.

[POEM] Eternally yours

Crush. Debilitating
Rush of blood
To the head, throbbing
Until the world starts to
Hush.
Heady. Suddenly
Unsteady and
Tumbling, unevenly
Because though I’m not
Ready.
Infecting. Slicing,
Dissecting me from
My bones. You’re enticing
Me for more. My heart is
Defecting.
Pain. Your love
Strain is asked
For, begged for. Shove
The hurt into me without
Blame.
Sunk. Prepared
Drunk that I am,
Addicted and bared
Onto you, never stop
This perfect and never ending pain.

[POEM] Blue Milk

It’s odd that one might have a vision of what might be,
When looking into the unknowing beyond.
To think that I had once expected your shape, your taste
And your glances long before I had met you.
I constructed a vessel that would hold my love to be,
Never once had my idiocy truly dawned
Upon me. I simply kept looking for this image with haste.
Convinced every second that my vision was true.

You were a glass of shapes unprecedented. Not just that,
But as I poured, expecting white, pristine milk,
You came out blue. Not unpleasant, not wrong, just
Different. Blue milk from an alien world.
Mild urges to run had to be suppressed, my mind spat
In anger as it struggled to determine your ilk.
You were not the vessel, you were not the want. Lust,
Need and truth was born, and finally unfurled.

Sipping blue milk, I found it not unpleasant.
Sipping blue milk, I found myself hesitant.
Sipping blue milk, and I was in another time.
I knew then, that we had been attached from birth with twine.
Softly floating towards each other, blindly.
You encompassed every single need totally.
You were unlike anything I had ever seen, imagined.

And that was when our love began.

[POEM] You, and you, and you.

You are such a drug. Just you.
Simply the outline and voice and scent of you.
I put my finger on it, and it dissolves into
The mystery that is you.

My heart is such a pit. Dark.
Tumbled into an unending intoxicating spark.
I tremble against it, but I melt into
This love, true and stark.

I could cling to you forever,
And happily feel the ache in my knuckles. Ever
Wishing this sweetest pain into
Me deeper. Leave me, never.

You are brighter than the sun,
Searing into my vision until eyes, closed, run
With tears that melt and twist into
Sight of you. My seeing done.

My galaxy, my swirling eternity,
Never leave me, my coloured universe in entirety.
I pray myself over and over into
Your arms, my precious deity.